October.

Here we are again - October. The month of a few family birthdays, clam bakes,  Halloween, apple cider and pumpkin everything. October is the essence of fall.

A year ago at this time I was just weeks away from running my first (and only) marathon to date.  Running miles during a grueling hot summer, I was so looking forward to running in the crisp fall air. What happened was completely the opposite.  October 16, 2016, I woke up in downtown Columbus, Ohio with temps in the mid 60's and humid air at 6AM. On October 16th, I was wearing a tank top and shorts. Long story short - it was a brutal fall marathon. I finished with sun burn and a stress fracture.  The sun burn faded, but the stress fracture kept me out of commission until January...and well that's another story for later in this post.

So you are probably wondering, WTF does this have to do with anything on this website? Let's just call this mini back story. It was one of those experiences that made me who I am now.  Here is where I am going...I was very high strung, angry, bitter, and depressed. I was a shitty person.  I had major disconnects with family and friends and at times I felt a sense of hopelessness. 

I had already made the decision (financially and mentally), that I wanted to be a yoga teacher. You're probably thinking with all the negativity I had in my life, how would I ever be able to teach yoga without wanting to rip someones head off?!  The truth was yoga was my one saving grace that made me feel better after ever long run and every crappy day at work and allowed me to detox everything and just let go of all that no longer served a purpose. No one judged.

Fast forward to January. I was starting to train again to get back in the groove of running so I could run the Cleveland half marathon.  This was not in the cards. On Wednesday January 11th at about 4:30am, I was excited to go for a short jog in my neighbor hood.  Just like October 16th, the weather was bizarre. It was a comfy 38ish degrees. As I stepped foot out onto the street, down I went.  Hours later, a trip to the ExpressCare and I am hobbling home with a splint and crutches. I had broken my toe. I definitely wasn't running anytime soon, but what about yoga?! My teacher training was starting in 2 days!!! I was in a panic texting my teacher Carrie. How was I going to do this?

I'll tell you. It was like riding a roller coaster. My emotions at first were all over the place. I was in physical pain with a broken bone and just really sad that I had to hobble around with a boot on my foot for a couple months- during winter (which I hate) while everyone enjoyed training together and more simply put - wearing 2 shoes.  Although, over those first couple months with my boot, I dove in and dedicated my heart and soul to yoga.  I couldn't run, so I took it to the mat, sometimes 5-6 days a week. Hot power classes, warm slow flow, ashtanga, kundalini, yin, restorative, and yoga + beer.  I felt myself softening and actually able to process emotions like a normal person.  I started to really understand how yogis always seemed so chill. I was becoming that very person.

I now am that person. 

I will end this first blog where I stared. Here we again- October. Full circle. October will always hold a place in my heart. Not only was it the month I ran a marathon, birthdays, clam bakes, Halloween, apple cider, and pumpkin everything, it was when I discovered who I was going to become.